What a difference a few days makes

So much for my hopes of not posting depressing stuff.

Last Thursday (6-15) I visited my mom. I had intended on showing her our new apartment, but as she wasn't feeling so hot, so I opted to just hang out with her at her place. Lend support, a shoulder to cry on, whatever she needed. What she needed, after a few hours of chit chat, was to be taken to Urgency Care to rehydrate her. This was the second time in a week that she felt completely dehydrated and had to make this trip. After spending some quality time at UC, they said her sodium levels were critically low and she needed to be taken to Southwest Wash. Medical Center to raise them.

So the adventure continued and she was taken to the SWMC ER. She was admitted to the hospital after a while in the ER and stayed there until Monday afternoon. Dr. Cornelia Taylor, a straight-shooter who wasn't about to fill our heads with delusions of longevity, had another CT scan done and this time it showed that mom has masses in her left lung, liver, and adrenal glands. Dr. Taylor also told us that her cancer appears to be pretty advanced. This was devastating news obviously, but to my mom's credit, she accepted it with grace and an eagerness to fight to the end. "I am not just going to let this take me without a fight," she told me as she lay in her hospital bed.

Though my mom faces a shortened life, there is always room for the unexplainable miracle to make an appearance. One cannot bank on such an event, but my mom can definitely count on support. She has myself, Jenny, Jen's dad Mike and the love of his life Judy nearby ready to do whatever whenever for her. She also has an organization known as Friends of the Carpenter in her corner. They have been her angels these past few years. They have given her a place to live as well as many new friends, a restored faith in God, and all the love in their bottomless hearts. I have traditionally been the only one to take care of her as our family unit is rather finite. Having them in her life has been a blessing that Jen and I cannot express enough gratitude for. She also has a core of friends who are praying for her and willing to do whatever they can to facilitate her recovery, or at least a decent quality of life. Some I know, some I don't, but I thank them all from the bottom of my heart. They are a big part of her healing and a big part of her life.

We go for a biopsy of the liver tomorrow (6-21) and meet with an oncologist Friday. More concrete information should come to light then. Though it appears right now it won't be the kind we want to hear, it is what we need to hear. We are as ready for it as anyone can be. My mom has already proven her strength to me throughout my life. She has had ample opportunities to throw in the towel several times in her life, but she is a much stronger woman than that. Lung cancer, liver cancer, whatever she must confront, she intends to do so without chemotherapy or radiation. She is so frail, weighing only 115 pounds, that the treatments would most likely take her down before the cancer has a chance to. For her, it's about quality of life rather than longevity at this point. I know in my heart that she will display the courage and strength that has defined her character to the very end, whenever that may be. Let's all hope for later rather than sooner.

p